|
I have to remember that eating more protein is higher in calories..But I'm getting very low carb choices.I will walk the entire course..Were going to spend the weekend with my daughter and SIL and my baby "WILL".My twins are leaving for a 35 day visit of Europe leaving on Tuesday with friends... I'm off to play before it reaches a 100 degrees here...
The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it’s still on the list.
Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.
I never really grew up, I only learned how to act in public
Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.
If sex is a pain in the ass, then you’re doing it wrong…
My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.
I didn’t fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian
You are such a good buddy that if we were on a sinking ship together and there was only one life jacket… I’d miss you and think of you often.
The doctor told a man I can cure your
headaches, the bad news is that it will require castration.
You have a very rare condition, which causes your testicles to press
on your spine, and the pressure creates one hell of a headache.
The only way to relieve the pressure is to remove the testicles.”
He was shocked and depressed. He couldn’t concentrate long enough to answer, but decided he had no choice but to go under the knife.
When he left the hospital he was without a headache for the first time
in 20 years, but he felt like he was missing an important part of himself.
As he walked down the street, he realized that he felt like a different
person. He could make a new beginning and live a new life.
He saw a men’s clothing store and thought, “That’s what I need – a new
suit.” He entered the shop and told the salesman, “I’d like a new suit.”The elderly tailor eyed him briefly and said, “Let’s see…size 44
long.” “That’s right, how did you know?” “Been in the
business 60 years!” It fit perfectly.
The salesman asked, “How about new shoes?” “Sure.” The salesman
eyed his feet and said, “Let’s see…10-1/2 E.” That’s right, how did you know?” “Been in the business 60 years!”
and the salesman asked,“How about some new underwear?” he said,“Sure.” The salesman stepped back, eyed his waist and said, “Let’s see, size 36.” “Ah ha! I got you! I’ve worn size 34 since I was 18 years old.”
The salesman shook his head, “You can’t wear a size 34. A 34 underwear
would press your testicles up against the base of your spine and give
you one hell of a headache.”
|